Thursday, November 8, 2012

Dear GOP

This may come as a surprise to you, but this vagina-owning lesbian (gasp!) would actually like to see you survive. I'd like to see you learn from your mistakes & find your way back to your founding principles (which, surprisingly, looked very much like the CURRENT platform of the democrats...y'all changed places, & then some!). However, listening to the "Monday morning quarter backing," y'all seem to be trying to swing things even further to the right, as if you weren't conservative enough. WOW! Really? 

Folks, please pay attention! You went OUT of your way to disenfranchise the poor, African Americans, Hispanics, the LGBT community, WOMEN (in general), & everyone in between! Y'all seriously think you weren't conservative enough?!?! 

The ONE thing Bill O'Reilly was correct about is that the white (& he should have said straight, white &/or their subservients) majority is being lost. Only trouble is, y'all fear that, forgetting that America is the melting pot. Diversity is NOT something to fear! It is to be embraced! Between your Neanderthal-like attitudes & lack of compassion (a Christian principle, btw), y'all are digging your own grave!!!

Cut it out! Seriously! Slam on the damn brake! EMBRACE diversity! You are killing what USE to be a viable, compassionate party! 

The populous is going to continue to tip, like it or not! If you continue to let neoconservatism drive your message, along with corporate greed & the NRA (a BS group, btw, with completely outdated views that are LITERALLY killing our country)...game over!!!

Those of us FORCED to the left, love this country, too! We understand what it stands for! Killing the education system (a key component of dumb-down-America neoconservatism) will not change that. And as our numbers grow, so goes your chance of EVER being viable again! 

Frankly, it saddens me to see what has become of your party. It saddens me that you don't 'get' that Rush, O'Reilly  Rove...should NOT be driving your platform! You let theatrical, FAR right, big mouths dictate what you think & how you should act. The moderates have been driven out. The RACIST tea-party (KIDDING yourselves if you think otherwise! They didn't even exist until the black guy got elected. Then they seemed to elect Trump as their racist leader) is at the wheel. Y'all need to call them a cab & grab a hold of reality again! 

We are a country with a 3 branch system. Checks & balances. There was a very real purpose for that. (NOT anti government VS big government. Pure bunk! Government was MEANT to be there FOR us. And we AREN'T socialism VS capitalism, either! WE are a democracy, which actually IS what's in the constitution, & that's what SHOULD have been heard & seen, rather than attempting to suppress our democracy.) It's why we NEED a viable second party! HELL, we need a VIABLE 3rd & 4th party!!! But the last thing we need is for the GOP, the only other 'major' party, to be going bat-shit crazy off a cliff! 

I beg of you to QUIT listening to the hard (& whacky) far right, with their self righteous BS, & get it together!!! 4 years will be over in a blink! I'd like to not LMFAO at the candidates you put forward, AGAIN! (FYI, and this is most especially for the left...get off you collective ASSES in the midterm! Your complacency was why the GOP thought they should lean even harder this time!)

Please, GOP, at least consider it! This was NOT a fluke! Y'all whipped up enough hate to actually pull this off...but the sheet got pulled away (yep, I said "sheet," because that's how you drove your 'message' home). You attacked EVERY group that might have otherwise been snowed into voting for flip-flopping Mitt. He flip-flopped, btw, because your HARD right dictated it. Grab a hold of some reality & sanity..."for LOVE of country."

Sarcasm aside, I mean every last bit of this! WE would love to see a real, TRUTHFUL comeback! (Clearly the BILLIONS poured into this campaign, via corporations, bought you crap...GO AMERICA!) For ALL of us, learn from this! PLEASE, get a grip!

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Graceland in 3D

This was our 4th Elvis Week so we pretty much have every accessible inch of Graceland already photographed. This time, we had a little fun with our photography. We have an app on our iPhones called Photosynth, which allowed us to take 3D panoramas of everything. Not super high quality, but it's free & fun (& looks amazing on our phones) so we can't complain! Happily, Photosynth has a site that allows us to share our panoramas...also for free! (Note: Go slowly & give them a chance to focus, as you drag the image around. You can also zoom in & out. I recommend zooming in once)

Our 1st night back in Memphis, we made our way to Beale St (that should not come as much of a surprise to anyone, lol) so I practiced a bit with the app, before using it at Graceland. Enjoy!


Beale St:





360 view of Beale St (from B.B. King's)



Graceland:


Graceland - almost 360 (by Michelle)



living room (by Michelle)



living room


dining room (1)


dining room (2)



kitchen


TV room (1)


TV room (2)


TV room (3)


billiard room (1)


billiard room (2)


The Jungle Room (1)


The Jungle Room (full view)


backyard


Vernon's office


backyard 360


pool, meditation garden, & racquetball court entrance



entrance of racquetball court (1)


entrance of racquetball court (2)


racquetball lounge (The last time Elvis ever sang, was at that piano, on 8/16/77)


trophy room (former racquetball court) - Only a fraction of Elvis' awards!


trophy room (2)


trophy room (3)


meditation garden (almost 360)


final resting place (1)


final resting place (2)


final resting place (3)


VIP exhibit - Elvis...Through His Daughter's Eyes



If you follow me on Facebook, have no fear, because there are more regular photos AND videos to come!

God Bless You Elvis! Thank you for everything!!! Loving you, always & forever<3

Sunday, February 5, 2012

My Babies!

A lovely friend (Jenna) is featuring rescued cats on her blog. My babies were featured! Meet David & Rocco!

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

What's in a name?

I've recently started a new delivery job, which gives me a lot of time to think, and a lot of time to listen to music. This past evening, I was enjoying Madonna's "Celebration" CD (an amazing compilation album that, if you like pop music even a little, you really should own it). I am constantly in awe of all that Madonna has accomplished, as I have been for most of my life.

Much love & respect to all of the women & divas who have come before her, but none of them has achieved what Madonna has. As I see it, she was the first woman to achieve Elvis Presley's level of fame. Certainly no woman could claim Elvis-like stature, & none has been able to maintain that kind of fame for as many decades as Madonna has (I love you Cher, but not even you...though you still have my undying love & admiration).

There is a valid reason why EVERY pop star, male & female, has read Madonna's playbook, whether they were fans or not.

Madonna EARNED the title "The Queen of Pop" (unlike some self titled court jesters, who I will not mention).

That said, there is a new force to be reckoned with, just in case you're a little slow on the uptake, or you weren't around to witness Madonna's climb so perhaps you aren't able to recognize the obvious.

As someone who became a die-hard fan of Madonna from the very first wiggle, & who immediately knew she was going to be a huge force, for a VERY long time. Someone who was also born an Elvis Presley fan & would throw herself in front of a bus for Aretha Franklin... I can recognize music royalty from a chart topper away.

Lady Gaga IS music royalty!

Now, before Iconner's try to flame my comments, hear me out fully. Please, for once, just suspend your thoughts & judgments (& for some of you, your hatred...not a virtue that Madonna likes AT ALL, btw) for the rest of this post & truly be open minded (Oh, & I appologize for the tone I'm about to take, but the only reason I'm writing this is because it's out of control & I've had enough...we all have).

First, you should truly understand that I'm certifiably insane when it comes to Madonna. I am NOT a casual fan whose opinion you can just brush off. I skipped school to attend each movie debute. My walls & ceiling were covered with every picture & poster I could find (married & a breath from 40, it's a little harder to get away with that much, lol). I have multiple Madonna tattoos, my two male cats are named David & Rocco, spent many an overnight waiting in lines for both concerts & appearances, met Donna & Niki...twice, as well as various dancers. I've touched Rocco (on the shoulder, you pervs), have been an arms length from Madonna, & she sang part of "Crazy For You" to ME (obviously a highlight of my life, that still makes me cry). I LOVE Madonna!!!

So when I say that Lady Gaga has IT, I know damn well what I'm talking about. Madonna did what she did & has stayed where she has, because she's SMART. Like it or not, so is Gaga.

And before you all start reaching into your back pockets, trying to come up with some crap about "Gaga copied this" & "Gaga stole that." Sit down!!!

"Good Artists Borrow, Great Artists Steal" - Pablo Picasso

No one knows that better than...

...wait for it...

...Madonna!

That's right, kids. Madonna! Like EVERY OTHER SUCCESSFUL ARTIST, she has "stolen" from other artists. If you're as old as I am & have been a fan from day one, then you know this to be undeniable. So to those who keep digging & searching for reasons to hate Gaga, perhaps because you think it makes you a better Madonna fan, you're going to have to come up with something a little less hypocritical.

I'm SO tired of the petty BS coming from Madonna fans, who feel threatened by Gaga's success. I'm NOT alone, either. A large portion of Madonna's fans are also Lady Gaga fans (aka Little Monsters), and with good reason (though ya'll have made it a bit scary for some fans to admit that. Please, if nothing else, swallow your venom & quit making other Madonna fans feel uncomfortable).

Gaga is freakin' smart, hella talented, INCREDIBLY good to her fans, AND she's a fan of Madonna. Basically, she's just like You & I (pun. Sorry).

Ponder this: If some of you die-hard Madonna fans went into the music business, could you deny her influence on you? Should you?

No & no! You'd be silly to do that, because you'd be denying what & who you are. You'd be denying what & who helped form your thoughts, opinions & tastes. Madonna has been one of the greatest influences & teachers in the history of the business. You'd be an Idiot (capital "I") to throw that away. Thankfully, Gaga is not an idiot.

That, however, does NOT make her a thief, just as it would not make you a thief. It DOES make her smart. JUST like Madonna! If you don't understand that, then...well, fill in the blank.

OK, I'm going to take the heat off of Iconner's for a moment...sort of. They HAVE, most definitely, been the instigators in this growing pissing contest. All that bitching & moaning about Gaga was bound to boil over. So now I'm starting to see defensiveness coming from Little Monsters. I can not blame them, but must now ask that they rise above it. I understand your frustration. You see what I see & want Gaga to be respected, as she should be. But so should Madonna. YES, Gaga is busting down door & blazing trails. You want some kind of a crown for her. I get it. But history books can not be rewritten. They can only be added to.

Elvis was, is & will always be The King. Aretha was, is & will always be The Queen of Soul. Madonna was, IS & will always be The Queen of Pop. It's a done deal. Sorry, chickadees. Game Over. (Though I must also point out that these titles, plus $5, will get them all a cup of coffee at Starbucks. No one should get as worked up about it as people are getting.)

So, since the title has been earned & taken, why can't Little Monsters think outside of the proverbial box? There is no need to get into that pissing match. It will only make you stinky monsters. Madonna is not responsible for the vocal bunch who aren't quite getting it. Just as Gaga isn't responsible for some of the idiot things that "monsters" have done & said (Adele will ring a bell for some of you true monsters).

BTW, I am a verified & tattooed Little Monster! Multiple concerts & multiple tattoos...one of which is where Lady Gaga personally signed me. I traveled from NH to NYC, as I had done so many times for Madonna, to wait overnight for Gaga's "Born This Way" signing, at Best Buy.

(FYI, "fan" is short for "fanatic." I fully acknowledge that & own it. I LOVE music, & when I love someone, I LOVE them.)

Bottom-line, I know of what I speak, from BOTH sides. If I can not get through to some of you older, crankier Iconner's (though that would be spectacular), then hopefully I can still reach some of you younger, more optimistic Little Monsters:

First, respect your elders. Madonna has NOT spoken ill of Gaga. She actually likes Gaga. So she has given you no reason to disrespect her stature & accomplishments. She earned the "title" & earned her place. If you want Mother Monster to be respected, DON'T disrespect others.

Second, you can be more creative than "queen of..." If Gaga can hang herself, rock a pod, grow bones, wear meat..., surely her Little Monsters can dig a little deeper (meat dress = totally gross, btw. As a vegan, I hated it. As a fan & lover of the arts, I got the message. She's not a vegan & wears leather, which truly is no different... as far as cruelty goes. I will not limit my musical tastes to vegan-only artists, just as I will not cut out friends & family who aren't vegan. ...But, Gaga, if you're reading this, maybe cool it with the animal stuff? You talk of love, respect & kindness. Spreading that message & setting that example, to/for ALL living souls, would truly be amazing! *fingers crossed*). Monsters, you can do better!!! Goddess? Fairy? Angel? Demon? Wizard? Warlock? Witch? Boss? CEO? ...MOTHER MONSTER? Why not ask her if she prefers one thing over the other? Or, if she even cares! It's about THE MUSIC.

Third, be strong. Remember these moments & these years. Some Madonna fans have forgotten what it was like to be a Madonna fan when she first came out...& for SO many years that followed. At age 12, 13, 14..., when you're dealing with awkwardness, sexuality, family matters, bullying, growing pains... it totally sucks (to use an 80's expression) to have the icon that your very heart beats for & bleeds for, being put down, slandered & called every name in the book. I can't tell you how many heated debates & arguments I had, defending Madonna. Or how many tears I shed, because "they just don't understand." Ultimately, Madonna rocked it out & I've had the last laugh. You will, too! But someday, like it or not, a new force will come along & stir the pot. Try not to freak-out!

Monday, July 4, 2011

A Painful Journey...


...And a lesson to learn.


Yoda was born the day after Christmas, 1992. His mom was not spayed, she sneaked out & returned pregnant. His mom's caretaker worked with my roommate & when he was in need of a home, I took him. I'd just adopted a kitty (Tangy) a couple of weeks prior, who'd been sick so I was worried about exposing him to a possible illness. I sat in the vets office, the day that Yoda was to move in, waiting for my roommate to bring him in for a check-up. She came walking in with a carrier box that was rocking & rolling, & he was hollering up a storm. So much so, the woman behind the counter had to pop her head around to see what the heck could possibly be making all that fuss. I admit, I was nervous. I was expecting an 8 week old kitten, not the Tasmanian Devil. We went into the exam room & he burst out of that box. It took FOUR people to hold him so blood could be drawn. Holy crap!

The vet said he looked good, but would call me with the results so I took my new little monster home. At the time, though I'd grown up with cats, this was my 1st time as a parent. I failed the 1st test miserably. When I got Yoda in the house, I let him out & Tangy attacked him immediately. I was in absolute horror! Here was this poor, (then) nameless kitten, who'd been taken from his mom, shoved in a box, had scary strangers stick needles in him & poke him in the butt, & now a giant cat was trying to eat him.

I got Tangy away, scooped up the tiny ball of fear, & locked myself in a spare room with him. I sat him on the bed, knelt down beside him, looked into his eyes, & there it was! I instantly knew his name. He was huddled, face scrunched up, giant green eyes & ears (with tufts of white fur) too big for his head. Yoda!

I grew up pretty fanatical about the Star Wars movies. I'd been to each one (of the initial trilogy) countless times, both at drive-ins & in theaters. Had the trading cards, action figures, iron-on t-shirts (it was the 70's).... I knew Yoda when I saw him. This little kitten was definitely Yoda!

Shortly after, the vet called me. Yoda tested low positive for feline leukemia. My heart stopped. They assured me that it was possible for him to further develop his own immune system & test negative, but that I'd have to keep him & Tangy separate for the next 30 days.

I kept Yoda in the bedroom & split my time between him & Tangy. Poor Tangy was much less than pleased that he was being locked out of a room, especially knowing that there was another cat inside. Here, he'd just gotten a 3rd chance at life, being rescued from a kill shelter, then overcoming illness...now some cute kitten is trying to muscle in on the action.

I felt sorry for both of them, but also for myself. I still grieved the loss of my Baby & Menew, the kitties I'd grown up with, who both passed away at 18 years old. I was scared to death that I was getting very attached to a kitty who could die. My heart was just not ready to take the loss. I prayed like I'd never prayed before, begging God to please let Yoda be healthy.

As you may have figured out from the photo above, 30 days later, he was given a clean bill of health. YAY! Now I just had to keep Tangy from trying to eat him. Having had a month to adjust to each other through a door, it didn't go as badly as I feared. Not only didn't Tangy try to eat him, they ended up pretty close friends.

However, in that time period, a strong bond was formed between Yoda & I. He discovered my ear lobes and would suckle one & knead in my hair (for those of you who know me now, but didn't then, I had both ear lobes AND long hair. For those who don't know me at all, my current hair is very short & my ear lobes have been gauged to 1/2", which I might add did not please Mr. Yoda). The suckling went on for years. As time went on, & I went through multiple hip surgeries, we became inseparable. Yoda was my shadow & my blanket. When I got my 1st computer, which I'd sit at endlessly, he's stay in my lap the entire time, sometimes making it difficult to get anything done...which was perfectly OK. How could I resist?

Yoda had a few nicknames, too. Baby boy, bird, yodie, yodie bird, booboo, sweet pea, bear, & my little portagee kitty (I am Portuguese & "portagee" is an improper slang for Portuguese people, but also a term that most have embraced). He earned that name when my roommate brought home some frozen chourico (Portuguese version of chorizo). I was holding him & she let him sniff it, before attempting to put it in the freezer. His eyes got as big a saucers & he made noises I'd never heard any cat make. He was squirming so bad, I could barely hold him. Seeing him freak out, she cut him a tiny piece, still frozen, and he devoured it! He cemented the nickname because he was also pretty savage about bread (a staple at every meal). We lived in an apartment building & had to bring the groceries up in trips. I quickly learned that I had to save the bread for last, as he'd tear through the wrapper & just start eating it like he'd been without food for days. Very strange, but very endearing, indeed!

Yoda got pretty large, in both directions. Being a new cat momma, I made the mistake that many do & gave in to all of his begging. When his 2nd vet, who I really liked, reprimanded me, the light went on & I knew things had to change...but it was tough. I switched both kitties to a lower calorie food & dramatically cut the treats (& no more people food! That one was the biggest heart-breaker). It didn't seem to do much. I swore Yoda would just lay closer to his food, as not to waste any energy, lol.

Thankfully he loved to play!!! I had never, & haven't since, seen a cat that could move like him, in mid air. Or one that could be at a stand still & get the kind of air under him that he could. Certainly not one his size! I'm 5'3" & his head could shoot even with mine, from a sitting position. That's like Kevin James pulling a Micheal Jordon. Impressive, wise Yoda!

Eventually a bit of the weight came off, but he remained "big boned."

Time went by & my roommate moved out. I also went through a terrible break-up, which left me a train wreck. But I had my boys. More than ever, they were my world. It's hard to keep feeling lonely & sad when you're literally spooning a cat the size of Yoda each night.

Did I mention his purr, his cry & his footsteps? I could hear him crying from the next house over. As for the purring & foot steps, those could be heard in any room of the house. I had hardwood floors & use to ask him if his momma wore combat boots. Thump, thump, thump, thump, thump.... He was big & loud, & full of sweetness & love. He worshiped me, even when I didn't love myself, & I learned what love truly was & worshiped him right back.

So now that you have some kind of a picture as to who Yoda was & how we felt about each other, I will fast forward some, to when we lost Tangy. Poor Tangy had gotten ill, many years later, this time more seriously, though he was managing. He'd gotten lovier than ever (for him), which felt like a sign to me. One day while cleaning, I discovered he'd passed. I was devastated. I still swear the sound of the vacuum threw him over the edge (living alone, I had gotten very lazy about such things). As heartbroken as I was, I worried about Yoda, who took it very hard. He developed the most mournful cry, that seemed to come from his toes, the minute I was out of his sight.

Within 2 months of Tangy's passing, it was decided that I would move to New Hampshire, to live with Michelle, whom I've since married. Yoda had only known that apartment, but I thought getting away from it might actually help him. Happily, being a ball of love, he quickly adopted his new mommy, who called him bear. He never lost that mournful cry, though.

[The rest of this post is meant as a warning, as well as a lesson, especially for myself. I don't wish our hell on anyone. It has been four years since Yoda was killed, but the pain is still excruciating. I relive that day every year & I pray that, by airing the events, and exposing his "vet," both of us can get some kind of closure. Though I will name the vicinity of the clinic, it should be considered a lesson to everyone, to always listen to your gut. It seems unconscionable that a veterinarian could be so bumbling & callous with regards to the most helpless & innocent, but it happens. It is our job to protect our pets, even from those we should be able to trust.]

All seemed to be going well when, almost a year after we moved, I noticed that Yoda wasn't eating much. Not a characteristic of a "big boned" kitty. He'd been a very healthy, indoor cat so I hadn't taken him to a vet in NH yet. I found one close by, in Boscawen, NH & made an appointment.

Yoda's new veterinarian was a young lady, who had a cat tattoo on her leg. I'm a big fan of tattoos & my mind reasoned that if she was passionate enough to have a cat permanently tattooed on, I could probably trust her. I have to fight the urge to say what I honestly think it represents, in retrospect.

The vet did blood work & determined that Yoda had a thyroid issue. She wrote a prescription & said his appetite should return within a couple of days. Very happy news, but that wasn't quite what happened. In a couple of days, he did eat a bit more, but then I was quickly back to coaxing him. At the same time, I also noticed he wasn't moving his bowels. It made sense. No food in, no food out. Also, if he was constipated, like any living creature, he probably wouldn't want to eat.

It was the morning of June 30th. I woke to the sound of a very loud purr in my ear. When I opened my eyes, Yoda's face was right beside mine, & my arm was wrapped around him. My beautiful boy, so happy & full of life. He looked & acted perfect. Being a worrying mom, I thought about the lack of bowel movements & when I finally talked Yoda into getting out of bed, I called his vet. She thought it would be a good idea to administer an enema. I was to bring him in that morning & told that I could pick him up in a couple of hours.

When I arrived to get Yoda, he was waiting in his carrier. He was howling & when they sat him beside me, I peeked in to tell him we'd be home soon & he'd be OK. After paying, I scooped him up & went to the car. I put the carrier on the back seat & looked in to try & calm him (like many cats, he hated to leave the house). What I saw gave me great concern. Yoda's head was tilted to one side. His eyes were huge & dilated. I was parked near the door & ran back in to say something was wrong with him.

The technician who had administered his enema (she told me when she brought him out to me), followed me to the car to have a look. She said she saw what I saw & carried him in to see the vet.

The tech asked me to wait momentarily while the vet examined him, & a few minutes later they called me in. I was horrified. Yoda was pacing, head cocked & no balance. His cry was abnormal & desperate, & his eyes were glossy & dilated. I was hysterical.

Someone came in with a chart & after the vet looked it over, she said that she didn't know why he was acting the way he was, as everything seemed normal. I could leave him, but all they would do was watch him so it was probably better if I took him home, where he'd be more comfortable. That part was the only thing that made sense.

His vet decided to give him some fluids first, just in case the enema had made him dehydrated. The fluids pooled on his side, under his front leg, & that's where they remained.

I got him home & was beside myself watching him. My precious boy seemed to be miserable & restless. He would try to sit for a few seconds, but then would begin pacing again. There had been no improvement & I knew that the clinic was getting ready to close so I called them again, completely panicked & crying.

I spoke with his vet, who tried to calm me & remained confident that he should improve. She said that if I continued to be concerned, I could bring him to the 24 hour emergency vet in Concord, but said that all they could do was watch him. Knowing how stressed he got, & how stressed he was, I was again talked into keeping him home...but everything felt so wrong.

More hours went by, without improvement. However, he finally sat quietly, in a dark corner of the bedroom, tucked behind the dresser & the hamper. I kept checking on him, but his eyes never closed (& remained dilated).

I was emotionally exhausted! I thought that as long as he was still & no longer crying, perhaps it was a good sign & I should try to get some rest. Michelle was watching TV so I asked that as long as she was awake, would she please keep checking on him...of course she agreed. She checked on him every hour, apparently with no change, until she fell asleep on the couch.

At 6:20 AM, I awoke to a blood curdling cry. My heart sank as I literally jumped off the bed. Yoda was laying at the foot of the bed, chin on the floor & all four legs straight out, like Bambi falling on the ice. I gently tried to get him to stand, but he just sank. Limp. I SCREAMED for Michelle to get up, as I scooped him up into my arms & headed for the door. "We have to go, NOW," I yelled. I didn't mean to yell, but I had never been more afraid in my life. Thankfully Michelle understood, shook the cobwebs & grabbed the keys.

I sat in the backseat with my baby, talking to him through my sobs, begging him to be OK, & telling him how much I loved him. He was talking back, but it seemed like it was taking every ounce of energy to speak.

It was very hot, this first day of July, even at that hour. Michelle had the AC on full blast & I sat him on the seat, in the hope of keeping him cool & more comfortable, as I prayed to just get there & let him be OK.

Michelle called the emergency vet to let them know we were on the way.

When we arrived, I ran in with him. They took him from me & asked us to wait while they examined him. When they finally brought us in, the vet had stepped out of the room. There he was, an IV in & heating pad wrapped around him, crying madly & restless.

A few moments later, the vet came in with the news. Yoda had acute liver failure.

Shock! How could that be?! How could this happen? He seemed perfect yesterday morning. After the enema, he was checked by the vet. How could she miss that?

My heart was broken & my head was swimming. I begged the vet to contact Yoda's vet. Something had to be wrong! This can't be happening. They took his blood less than 24 hours ago.

That's what I thought, anyway. When the Boscawen vet returned the emergency vets call, she told them that they didn't take any blood from Yoda.

WHAT?!! How?! After seeing him in that condition, how could they neglect blood work? What the heck did they do while I waited? What was she reading in the chart?

I never felt so angry & betrayed in my entire life. Yoda woke me on Saturday morning, happy & full of life. He was given an enema & was now in end stage liver failure. It seemed as clear then, as it does four years later. Something went wrong when they administered the enema (a puncture?). Then the doctor, who's suppose to care for the wellbeing of innocent lives, neglected to take basic steps in diagnosing him, causing him unnecessary agony, & ultimately his life.

I now had to put my anger on the back burner. My precious love was laying there, suffering. I now had to muster the strength, through endless tears & pain, & do what was best for him, by verbalizing the green light for him to be euthanized.

I kept crying & kissing him, telling him that I was so sorry, over & over. I'm so sorry, Yoda. I'm so sorry, baby. I love you, baby boy. I'm so sorry, booboo.

To this day, I'm still saying I'm sorry. He needed me to care for him. To look out for him. To protect him.

I put blind faith in someone that I trusted was there to care for him. To help him. To heal him.

I love you, Yoda, & I'm still so sorry, baby boy! I will love you & miss you for as long as I live. I pray that you're at peace. I pray that I will find peace. And I pray that someone will learn from our story so they will avoid the same agonizing outcome.

God Bless You Yoda
Mommy loves you!

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Meeting Lady † Gaga - 5 † 23 † 2011


This weekend I traveled to NYC for Lady Gaga's "Born This Way" release-day signing, at the Best Buy in Union Square. Took a bus on Sunday, from Concord, NH to Boston, MA, & transfered to New York, NY. After dropping stuff off at our rad friend's house (Hope... love you! Thank you, again!), I cabbed it to Union Square. Got there 8:30ish PM to find quite the line across the street from Best Buy. I also noticed a heated debate in front of Best Buy so I went there first, because Best Buy had been less than forthcoming about how things would be handled. Listening in didn't clear much up, but I did get to talk to a couple of the people who had been keeping the crowd across the street organized. They were actually keeping a numbered list & I was happy to here that I was number 135. YAY!!! (FYI, the limit was 500. 50 wristbands had been given that day, to folks who purchased a new phone & 2 year contract. So 450 was our cutoff.)

My friend Miguel, who I met last November in a Madonna line, had been torturing himself about going. Without having to do too much arm twisting, he joined me in line. YES!
Miguel


We also bonded with three other people in line. One of them was Jon, from New Jersey, who's 25 & adorable! We were suppose to leave our gifts for Gaga in a basket, which I did, but Jon smuggled in a stuffed monster & a bottle of Jamison... in his pants. My Hero :)
Jon


The other two, Mikey & Marissa, were already friends. Both are from New York & both are 19. They each told their parents that they were staying at the other persons house that night. Love it!
Mikey


Marissa


We kept each other comfortable, entertained, and fought off the rain together (as well as our feelings toward the grumpy NYPD). One of the best parts about being fanatical is making equally fanatical friends!

So after being awake for 24 hours, we got Gaga's new CD (I got the standard version, too) & our bracelets!!! YAY

We got back into line around 5 PM (give or take... I'd had an hour nap so I'm not sure). The event was scheduled from 9 - 11 PM. It didn't actually begin until 10:20ish PM. Gaga hugged & kissed EVERYONE, engaged everyone in conversation, & was accommodating of everyone's requests. That doesn't happen, folks! She did that for all 500 of us, plus Best Buy employees. Lady Gaga signed for FIVE hours. She's truly special!

At 1:18 AM I had my moment, and all of the waiting was SO worth it!!!

The event streamed live online & Miguel had his boyfriend, Jerry, record my moment. Those two are keepers!!!


The only thing missing in the video was when I first got on stage ("You & I" had just started playing), after looking into my eyes & seeing that I was crumbling, Gaga grabbed my hand & twirled me, & she had me twirl her (I "danced" with Lady Gaga!!!). After the twirling, she kissed my cheek & gave me a huge hug!!

I then showed her my Mother Monster tattoo & she loved it & said she wants to get one similar (squeal), & commented on how sweet it was (to have her monster paw bursting through the sheet music for Speechless).

After that, she signed my wrist with "Lady†Gaga" (which has been tattooed on).


How could I NOT cry?


Before

After


She then hugged me again, while saying "thank you for believing in me. I will always believe in you." I was so overwhelmed, I almost left without my Born This Way booklet, but she stopped me & signed it. She asked if my name was spelled with an I or a Y & said "what a beautiful name, Wendy!"

I cried so much before, during & after, I'm surprised I haven't needed an intravenous.

I LOVE you Lady Gaga!!!!!!!! Thank you so much for your kindness & generosity! I will always believe in you, too! God Bless You! OX

And one last thanks to my beloved wife, who didn't even blink at my desire to run off to another state for 2 days, to fawn over another woman. Thank you, Michelle! I love you, sweetheart!!! OX